Waiting for Miscarriage

This is such a hard thing to endure! I am so sorry you have to deal with it.
I miscarried after 4 1/2 months and here is how it went for me once the bleeding began. I spotted for about 24 hours, then I started with severe cramping. I had two children already so the cramping felt like I was in full labor and this lasted for 4 hours or so. Then I went to the doc and he went ahead and gave me a pill that was supposed to help things along so I wouldn't have to do a D&C. He instructed me that if I did not deliver the baby by Friday afternoon (this was on Thursday) then I would have to go back for the D&C. I had more cramping that afternoon and passed a bunch of pretty horrible stuff. I thought I was done but went ahead and took it easy for the next 24 hours since I was flat worn out. I did continue to bleed and pass stuff for that whole time By Friday afternoon, I was convinced that the baby had passed (I had no idea how big it was so I made an assumption).

The next morning (Saturday) at around 10am I sent my husband to my son's soccer game and stayed home with my other son to recoup. We laid down for a nap and I woke up out of a dead sleep, felt severe pain and delivered the baby. Needless to say, it was shocking and it was finally over.

As rough as everything was though, I was glad that I waited and didn't do the D&C. I just felt like my body could handle it and I didn't want any more horrible stuff to happen with the baby that was from the outside. Sounds weird I know.

Regardless, I think you should call your doctor, tell them you are uncomfortable with a D&C and can you wait safely. Ask them if there is any other option to push the process along. Just be sure you are safe, you can get very ill if you body doesn't pass the baby on its own.

Again, I am SO sorry you have to go through this, it is very hard. Blessings to you.

Hi A., Just thinking of you and praying for you and your family. K. K.

Hi A.,
I am so sorry about your miscarriage. That is such a hard thing. If at all possible, I would wait it out and let your body naturally process the miscarriage. Now that you have started the process, it is truly better to let your body handle it. The D&C can cause scarring, which may make it difficult for you to conceive again later (making it hard for the egg to implant in the uterus). Of course, if it becomes medically necessary, you should do it, but at this point, I would wait it out.

Again, I'm so sorry.

I started spotting the morning of my scheduled D&C in 2006. The doctor went ahead with the procedure because a natural miscarriage can last for up to two weeks and I could not handle that emotionally. Talk to your doc, but in the end I believe that decision will be up to you.

Hi A.
I am so sorry this is happening to you!!!! I was almost 9 weeks and also miscarried. I spotted for about 4 days and then the cramping started and I had more bleeding but not as much as a normal period. It took about a little over a week for me to stop bleeding and I had another ultrasound to make sure I had passed everything.

take care
K.

I am so sorry for you. No advise from me but you are in my prayers.

A., I am so so so sorry. I have JUST gone through this - like literally had a D&C TODAY. I was told that the D&C would be much less painful than naturally letting it go. I have to say, I am having no discomfort. I feel some cramping, but there is a lot less blood than if I were to let everything happen on its own. I know it is a bit different for everyone, but this seems to be the average.

Again, I am so sorry for you. I completely know how you feel. Prayers are with you! YOu can send me a private message if you want.

Chrissy

A.,

I miscarried when my daughter was five months along. I did not have a D&C. While I was on a vacation, I began to cramp and spot, so we went to a hospital which shall remain unnamed to protect the guilty. I was put in a room, and then ignored for a substantial period of time. I miscarried naturally while I was waiting for the doctor to come in and look at me. Shortly thereafter, a nurse arrived and discovered that I was hemorrhaging. They then provided appropriate medical care. If I had been at home or, worse, had actually gone on the river rafting trip I was preparing to embark upon, I may have bled to death.

Bottom line: Miscarrying naturally can be fairly hazardous. Contact your doctor immediately.

I am so sorry about what you are going through. This was my first child, and the hole will always be there. But, I was able to have another child, who is the joy of my life. This is a very, very difficult experience, but you can get through it and things can be better in the future. My best wishes are with you.

From my personal experience, I would get it. I admire these women that said they went through all of that. I can not even imagine. It's emotionally draining knowing that you lost the baby. Having to go through all of that would have just done me over. I really wanted to go naturally and not get the D&C but my doctor kinda talked me out of it. She's amazing and I love and trust her so I did the D&C. It was quick, painless and I didn't bleed for very long. If I remember right it was only a few days, nothing more than a period either. I am forever grateful she urged me to get the D&C. I couldn't have taken any more emotionally and it can take a long time and there can be problems. I was pregnant again four months later (by surprise) and am watching my one year old baby girl play in the living room. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I know what you're going through. You'll make the best decision for yourself. I'm so sorry for your loss and hope that you find comfort with whatever decision you choose to make.

The same thing happened to me when I was 8 weeks along. My doctor kept telling me to let it pass naturally I had a vacation planned and my doctor had a vacation plan. So I thought fine I will. It can't be that bad it happens to women all the time. So I went on vacation (I was just going to my sisters house who just had a baby) started spotting a little thought ok I will just keep watching nothing more happened. When I finally got in to see my doctor I was what would of been 15 weeks along. (Waited 7 weeks) Still no miscarriage so I went in for a D&C. By that time I was ready to move on. Your body may not let it happen naturally and you could be waiting and waiting. I would tell you to go get a D&C so that you can move on enjoy the Holidays and not worry about when it may happen. It is hard enough to get bad news like that but there comes a time that you have to move on and you can't until it is completely done.

I'm so sorry. I had 4 weeks between finding out I needed and D&C and doing the D&C. The longest 4 weeks. I'm so sorry for your loss. I would go ahead and do the D&C if you can afford it. I bled for a week and still had fully miscarried, so it was very long. It's really up to you. I have a friend who miscarried at that point with no problems. It went pretty quickly once the cramping and bleeding started, although the cramping was pretty intense. I'm praying for you! I know this is a difficult time.

Hi A., I'm SO sorry for your loss. I've been through this twice. The first time, I was about 9 1/2 weeks along and I started spotting. I had an ultrasound and was told there was no heartbeat and my doctor said to let nature take its course and I would have what would be like a very heavy period. A couple of days later, I was home alone with my 1 year old son, strapped him in his high chair and went to the bathroom. As soon as I sat down I started gushing. We live out in the country, and thank God my mother-in-law was home (who lived next door) to come take care of the baby while my sister-in-law took me to the hospital. I was told I lost around 2 litres of blood. I had a D&C and recovered pretty quickly, although with the amount of blood loss I had to quit breast feeding cold turkey and had to wait 3 months before we could try again. I got pregnant right away and, again at 9 1/2 weeks, the baby died. I opted for a D&C right away, and recovered relatively quickly again. Turns out, I have a gene mutation that causes my placenta to clot, and the next time I got pregnant I had to give myself shots of Heparin every day - and had another beautiful baby boy. The perinatologist who found the gene mutation said my first son was a miracle from God - he should have miscarried the way the other 2 did or been born with Spina Bifida, and he's perfect!

A D&C is a pretty painless procedure, and I didn't experience much bleeding afterward. That would be my choice, but you need to do what feels right for you. Again, I'm sorry for your loss. I'll keep you in my prayers.

A.,

I'm so sorry!! I have no advice to give. I've only had one 'possible' miscarriage and I can tell you it was no fun, particularly since I was not aware of the pregnancy. I was only 6 weeks and we had though we were pretty barren at the time so I wasn't tracking anything! I bled a lot for about 6 days. A warm bath seemed to be the only thing that helped me. I hope you get good advice from others as I've got none.

Sending you hugs and encouragement!

V.

I'll so sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage at 12 week, and miscarried at home, by choise. My circumstances were a little different, it was the spotting that sent me to see my midwife, only to find out we had lost our baby. It was about 2 1/2 days fom the time I started spotting, until I actually passed the placenta. If you want to let nature take it's course, talk with your dr so that they can tell you when you need to see them. Bleeding will be heavy, but if you fill heavy duty pad faster than 1 hour, you need to call him/her. Also, if the placenta is in pieces, not intact, you also need to call. The morning I actually miscarried I had more cramping and increasing bleeding that eventually turned into regular contractions, and then subsided when I passed the placenta. From that point on, the bleeding started to slow, and the physical pain was minimal.

You will get thru this, just take care of yourself and give yourself time to grieve. (((HUGS))

I had exactly the same experience. I learned at 8 weeks, there was no heartbeat. I choose to wait. I ended up spotting and cramping for over a week and finally went through with the D&C. I wish I had done the D&C earlier. It wasn't a bad procedure at all and I knew it was over and could move on.

It is such a hard thing to go through - I really do feel for you. Mine was my first pregnancy... two months later, I found out I was pregnant again, and it resulted in a beautiful little girl.

There aren't any words to make you feel better. Just know you will get through this - you'll never forget, but you will heal. Take good care!

With mine I started spotting the night before, went to the ER and they couldn't find a heart beat. The bleeding started in full force the next morning and lasted all day. I gushed blood...it felt like I was peeing myself. At one point I passed out because the blood was coming so fast and so much! I would say that even if you start the process naturally to go in so the doctors can keep an eye on things. After the bleeding of the misscarraige, I bled off and on for about 6 weeks just like I did after delivering my first child (and second child AFTER my miscarraige) I'm sure every woman is as different as can be...I didn't have much cramping while others have never felt so much pain. I am sorry you are having to go through this heartbreaking process...but know you are not alone and there are women out there who really DO know what you are going through (physically and emotionally). My thoughts and prayers for you and your family

Hi A.,
I haven't read the other replies, so I apologize if this is redundant. I have had 7 miscarriages (genetic issue) and from my personal experience I would say DEFINITELY DO THE D&C! I have had 2 D&C's due to no Heartbeat and 5 "normal" miscarriages. It is much easier emotionally to do the D&C. The process of naturally handling it is devastating physically and emotionally.
Just from my point of view. You are in my thoughts and prayers. If you want to talk more I am here, feel free to email me directly. Hang in there. MUCH HUGS!
B.

I am SO sorry. It is a sad and hard thing to go through. You might want to delay your D&C by another day or two if that is an option, if you've started cramping and spotting. I went through this several years ago, and once the cramping started it gradually increased. It really didn't take more than a day or so at that point. You will bleed pretty heavily during and after. I was extremely tired due to the amount of bleeding that I had. If you bleed very severely after, you should go in to make sure you not hemmorhaging, however. But bleeding more heavily than a period and for more days is typical. Also, when you get your 1st period after you will bleed a bit more heavily, with extra clotting. Again, I am so sorry.

I had the same thing happen. I wasn't offered a D&C... I was 18 and my Doctor didn't appreciate that. She said "your babys dead", and walked out of the room. At that time I was almost 4 months pregnant. It was the most horrible experience of my life, especially with no idea what to expect. It took about 3 weeks before anything happened. I started light cramping around 8 am,heavy cramping around 4, and by 9 it hurt so bad I was screaming. I bled A LOT. I don't wanna scare you or anything, but the "overnight" pads were lasting about 3 minutes, I just sat on the toilet and kept flushing. After about 3 hours of my body trying to pass it with the excruciating cramping, throwing up, etc, I went to the hospital. They gave me morphine & continued to let it pass naturally... took only about another hour after I was relaxed with the medicine. Since you weren't quite as far along, what I have heard is that it is nowhere near as painful or bloody, but then again everyone is different. I am so sorry for your loss... no matter when it happens, it is such an enormous devastation that no one else can really understand. Take time to mourn the baby if you need it... that really helps.

Hi A., I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a missed miscarriage in April and had a D&C at 9 weeks. My experience with the D&C was very little pain, very little bleeding, and at least I could go ahead and move on. Particularly because you cannot "time" when you will start to pass tissue and bleed, it is certainly a more "convenient" way to deal with the physical portion of the loss. Big (((HUGS))) to you.

Warmly,
S.