How Old Should a Child Be When They Learn to Use Utensils?

My nanny insisted I use chopsticks from the time I started eating solids. My mum said it was HILARIOUS, because I would try and try to eat my asagohan in the morning and it would takes ages just one grain of rice at a time, then I'd get frustrated, grab a handful and shove it in, and then my nanny would patiently redirect me to go back to my chopsticks. (We're not japanese, but we lived in japan).

With my own son, I always provided silverware or chopsticks, but he used them sporadically. I think by 2ish he was using them MOST of the time. Like the PP, my kiddo *hated* being fed. I think I've fed him in total fewer than 5 times. He was always a very "do it myself" kind of child.

For soup, I'd just separate it. The solids would go on his tray or plate, and the liquid would go in a sippy cup.

I wouldn't worry too much about it....it's probably just a phase. My oldest never liked to us utensils when she was that age. I had to feed her myself all the time. I kinda liked it cause she never really got messing trying to do it herself. But around 2 or 2 1/2 she really got the hang of it and then was fine. Now she is 3 and 1/2 and eats by herself no problem. Now my second daughter hates to be fed and has been using her hands or utensils since about 13 months. So all kids are different. i would just maybe show her the utensils for every meal...like just leave the fork on the table but don't make her use it unless she wants to. Really she is still very young so don't stress.

I had child-sized utensils out on the high cahir tray or the table when my kids were very young. By one year, both of my daughters knew what they were and the basic concept of how to use them. Mastery of all utensils just gradually came with age and fine motor skills as my kids grew and developed. Nevertheless....I always encouraged proper usage of utensils and always made it a point to be a good example myself on how to eat nicely and properly with them. My kids were never allowed to run around the house, the kitchen, or wherever, if they were eating. No way. In the highchair or at the table or your done and the food goes bye-bye. I am not fond of the pint-sized "Dine and Dash" theory. It is not only a huge bad habit that takes a long time to break, but walking around or running around and taking bites of food here and there is ridiculous. Kids have to eat and they will get hungry and they will feed themselves when they are ravished. I would put her at the table, in whatever seat you feel is good for her, give her her plate of food, and the utensils, and encourage her to eat with the spoon or fork and make a game out of it. Maybe "follow the leader" or "copy me" and you be the role model. Praise her big-time if she does the right things. If she tries to get down or won't eat the food without you, the meal is over and she has to leave the table. No snacks or goodies for her later, either. A few of these zero tolerance moves and a hungry tummy will teach her that you mean business and mealtimes are not going to be a struggle or a joke. Put the foot to the floor and just help her out by taking control. You can do this!!

each child is different.

Both my kids had different time lines for that. Its okay.

When a child shows curiosity and wants to try it, then they can.
Of course at the age of your child, they will not be 'expert' at it yet. This is normal. They will start off just acting like it is a toy... then fumble with it and poke around with it. ALL normal. They do not have the fine-motor skills for using it perfectly, yet. It is developmentally attained, over time and practice.

My son just made 4... and over time since he was 1 years old... he is NOW 'expert' at utensils and not clumsy with it anymore.

Next, MANY kids do NOT like eating in high chairs.
My kids HATED it.
So, I fed my kids with them just sitting on a regular chair at the table. OR, at the coffee table in the family room.
OR, on their child-sized table and child sized chair.
They like this MUCH better.. .and then, eating was not a battle and they ate. Happily.
Kids don't have to sit in high-chairs.
Many kids just hate it...then they won't eat. Or, will fight about it.

I've used my fingers too, for feeding my kids when young. MANY cultures do this. Utensils, are not always the only way.

Kids, will naturally start using Utensils.... naturally.
They won't eat like cave-men forever. It is a natural progression. And occurs in "stages."

all the best,
Susan

hi~
Spoon use ranges from 14-24 months (typically is not precise, may still spill from spoon), uses a spoon well from 24-30 months. Fork use is between 2 ½ years to 3 ½ years. One of the developmental screening tools spoon use ranges from 12-15 months.

That being said it takes practice and making a mess in order to improve with this skill

If you want to encourage this skill think about the type of spoon she is using.
Characteristics of an Effective Spoon
• The bowl of the spoon is relatively flat so that food can be removed easily by the upper lip.
• The spoon does not shatter or break if the child bites down on it.
• The bowl fits the size of the child's mouth.
• Metal spoons are covered, coated, or have a plastic bowl for the child who is hypersensitive to temperature or taste or has a bite reflex.
• The length of the handle is appropriate to the size of the feeder's hand for dependent feeding and appropriate for the child's hand in independent feeding.
• The handle of the spoon is wide, thick, and short for the child who is developing self-feeding skills.
• The spoon can fit into an adaptive handle for holding assistance when necessary.
• The spoon is interesting to the child who is learning independent spoon-feeding. Color and design can attract and maintain the child's attention.
• The spoon is the appropriate weight for the child's independent feeding needs.
• The spoon has a pleasing texture for the child to hold.

hope that helps!

I used to always hand our daughter a spoon even though was feeding her. I think they get frustrated because they cannot do it fast enough themselves. She would be attempting top scoop and feed herself in between me feeding her.

Also our daughter went through phases of liking a curved handled spoon and a straight spoon also plastic vs, metal. I never knew which one she would "choose" I just had them ready for her .

Well me personally I would probably stop feeding her if I could only use my hands. She can feed herself with her hands, but you don't really need to do that. I'd say it was around this time my daughter became interested in utensils. By 2 she was proficient with them, but she wouldn't eat anything off a spoon (from my hand or hers) from 8 months to at least 15 months, so that's not strange it can just get frustrating! ;) I would say give them to her, but don't stress if she doesn't use them. As far as the high chair, I think it was closer to 18 months that my daughter started resisting it. Have you tried removing the tray and just pushing the high chair up to the table? We did that for months and put her plate right at the table like us and it was fine. At about 21 months I got her a booster chair and it was a waste of money...she just wanted to sit in the adult chair! Of course! I'd say go by her cues. She may be a bit young to be in a regular chair, but let her try it for snack times and see what happens! If she can do it you might as well let her and make your life easier!

I can assure you at 18 she will eat with a fork at her senior prom.
Until then all you can do is help her, show her and be patient.

We gave our kids silverware (toddler size) when they started solids at 6mos old and they could both use them correctly by a year old because they always had them to use themselves.

At this age, just give her the food on a plate with a toddler size fork and spoon and let her eat herself. Praise her when she does well.

I guess it depends on the child. Our 17 month Kate hates being fed, skipped baby food from the gitgo, and insists on feeding herself. She refuses to eat unless she is holding the spoon or fork. She actually prefers to use them over her own hands/fingers. (we all eat at the table and she watches us and her three older siblings like a hawk.)

We let her use plastic forks/spoons or silverware.

My first son wanted to be fed for a long time. He did enjoy *trying* to feed himself oatmeal and yogurt around 15 months, but I think it wasn't fast enough for her, he wanted me to give him big bites quickly :P
My second son was more independent and started using the spoon around 12 or 13 months!!
They are all different.

You've got time. It is all motor skills and interest. My son when he was that age would eat speghetti with sauce with his hands, it was both cute and disgusting. By 2 he was pretty good with fork and spoon. That is becasue my mom insisted he eat properly as she always told us we were using real forks and spoons on glass plates before 2, but my mom is a little nutty with what her expectations are. Now my kiddo is 7 handles all 3 utensils perfectly and has just mastered chop sticks. Bottom line at your daughters age, hands are just easier and she gets more food that way.

My little boy is 23 months but at the same sort of age he went through exactly the same thing so i asked my mum and she gave me some great advice she said that no child will deliberately starve itself so stand back and let them get on with it yes there will be a few tantrums and maybe a few screaming abdabs but dont worry if they dont eat the first time clean them up get them down dont feed again until the next meal unless of course its the last meal of the day and you want to sleep at night and then try again at next meal or snack time the other thing is let them get messy its a major part of learning i did it with mine and he now feeds himself with a fork. Hope this is helpful x

I just always gave a spoon to my kids from the time they started around 6 months. I guess they were trying to feed themselves as eary as 12 months and probaby pretty successful by 18 months. My 2 1/2 year old is still learning to use a fork successfully, it depends on what the food is. My 6 year old still struggles to cut her own food. So, it's all relative.

She's way too young to worry about that just yet. Get her a little heavy plastic fork and spoon and put it on her tray when you feed her. Eventually she'll want to try them out, just because you are using yours. Kids this age enjoy the texture of the food almost as much as the taste, so eating with her fingers is part of the pleasure and part of the learning process as well.

It hadn't even occurred to me to give my son his own utensils at 15mo, I guess I must have handed him a spoon now and again early on but he wasn't into it so I didn't push.
We went to visit my grandparents when he was 17mo and my grandmother gave him utensils at every meal. Either she just gave them out of habit (she's a table setter, I'm a grab your silverware on your way out of the kitchener) or she thought it was icky that he was still eating with his hands and was determined to do something about it if I wasn't going to. Either way she was nice about it and since he seemed interested I figured he was ready to give it a shot. He made such a HUGE mess when we ate out one day (the day he figured out how to use the spoon as a catapult) that my poor grandmother freaked out a little on behalf of the busboys. I had to remind her that sometimes it's best to leave a REALLY big tip and just go because she was getting ready to crawl around on the floor with a napkin while the bus boys were standing around with their brooms waiting for her to move already. Meanwhile my in dire need of a nap kid was getting ready to pitch a fit in case there was someone in the restaurant he hadn't already annoyed with his flying food.
Anyway, he's 23mo and using a spoon and a fork pretty decently. Still gets food on himself and still uses his fingers half the time but I have hope that he'll one day be able to eat in the company of decent folk without causing major offense. I think you've gotten some good advice, especially from AJ C, I thought I'd tell you a funny silverware related story to give you hope for the future.

Using utensils is much like learning to use a pen or pencil - it's all small motor control. She'll start using a spoon or fork around 3 or 4 years, but won't be good at using them till 5 or 6 years. I think it's a bit early to hand the utensils over to her yet. How they eat isn't important right now as long as they are eating a good amount and it's healthy food. I might have taken a bit longer than some other Moms at teaching my son, but then I didn't have to keep mopping up the kitchen floor after every meal and that worked well for me.

My 14 month old son doesn't really use the fork or spoon well yet. He does prefer me to hand feed him. There have been times when he down right refused to eat from a fork or spoon {plastic} when he was teething. However, I recently bought a set of Gerber suction plate with fork and spoon. He loves it! Its designed to train the child to feed on their own. It has a rounded edge plate so its easy to scoop the food. And the fork and spoon are metal with big rounded handle grips. He has been feeding himself since I used them. And of course I clapped and let him know I was very proud and called him a big boy. I don't know if that's what is going on with your daughter but I thought I would at least share... As far as not sitting in her chair, do you feed her outside the chair? She could just enjoy eating on the go more, most kids do. My son loves his high chair and I rarely feed him outside of it. A bite of something here or there but I read its important to always feed at the table in their chair. If I'm totally off here, sorry. ;}Good luck! :}

My 2.5 year old still prefers to eat with her fingers and does so 70% of the time. I wouldn't be worried about it, especially at her age. The person who asked that probably doesn't have much experience with little kids.