Husband Weight Issue

Hi K.,

There really is an addiction here. I don't believe it's to the food as much as to the chemicals that are within the junk food today. The only way to get past this issue is to get him healthy. If he's not willing to give up his junkfood you need to get the nutrition in him another way, an absorbable multivitamin. My husband lost 110 pounds this way with a specific multivitamin/mineral complex. It has stayed off for five years now. What happens is as they get healthier, they don't crave the junk. My husband has totally lost his appetite for stuff that isn't that good for him. He will eat an occasional (one every six months) hotdog because he remembers loving them, but usually it upsets his stomach and he realizes that he doesn't want them anymore....until the next time he walks in Costco. Good thing I do most of the shopping, lol.

Chemicals in foods, even pesticides and preservatives, contraindicate in a person's body just like mediciations do. Weight is not meant to be imbalanced on the body so if he has a spare tire, he is nutritionally deprived (much like these skinny little teenagers at the mall that have a jiggly belly!) Once nutrition actually absorbs the middle will drop off first, unlike dieting where the weight drops off at all the wrong places.

Hope I helped!

M.

Has he had a physical lately? If not, schedule one for him, and maybe the dr. will bring it up.

Other things to try: start a family walking routine or just exercise together.
M.

When was the last time he had a physical? My husband had gained weight--kept complaining how all of his t-shirts were getting shorter and wider.....uh.....yeah right! LOL I suggested maybe it was his belly taking up some of the room in his shirts, but he thought I was nuts!
He went for a physical and they detected VERY high blood pressure. He got meds and in about 2 weeks, dropped 10-12 lbs. He wouldn't put a single piece of junk in his mouth--he was eating fruit and rice cakes. I think it scared him and I guess info coming from a doc is more believable.

Yes, this is tough.......and it is hard not to get resentful because you work so hard to have healthy meals at home just to find out what goes on during the day. Tell him my husband waited too long to break this pattern and now has Type II diabetes. Tell him you love him and want him to be healthy. Here is a great diet that has worked for my guy:
http://www.cinchplan.com/healinghappens

BUT, that's all you can do. He has to decide. It's frustrating, but you can't control him.

Let me know if I can help. I'm sure my husband would talk to him if he wanted to talk to a man.

I had a similar situation and I know, it can be very frustrating! It IS your problem because this effects you and your whole family. I think the key here is getting to the root of what is causing his weight gain. In my husband's case, it was stress, guilt, and sadness. Once he was able to start working through his psychological issues, he got motivated to loose over 40 lbs. As he lost more weight, those issues started to resolve themselves as well. I don't care what overweight people say, there is almost always a root to the weight gain.

This is a problem as old as the ages. You don't say how old your hubby is, but it sounds like he is gonna do what he wants to do. I tried to force good health on my husband from the beginning of our marriage. At age 40, and going through mid-life crisis, he not only declared his independence--almost to the point of divorce--but accused me of trying to control everything about him including the food he ate. I thought I was just trying to keep him healthy and alive. That's when I took my hands off!!! For ten years he ate whatever, and I cooked it however he pleased. I continued to eat correctly as well as our children. After ten years, he began having problems. Of course, when he went to the doctor with the problems, he got the same info I had tried to give him. By then he was Type 2 diabetic, had soaring cholesterol and tryglycerides. Now he eats healthy. So my advice is just shut up and let the man do what he wants. You are wasting your breath if you do otherwise. I would adivise taking out a healthy life insurance policy on him, though.

find an article about balanced eating (using food groups) and share it with him. Suggest a food diary for a few days--it is hard, but do-able for a few days and is a real eye-opener! (there are many variations on the food diary and it doesn't have to be real detailed, but approx size is important to understand serving sizes. I did one on a chart I made on the computer)

Good for you for keeping the junk out of the house and trying to talk to him. Keep lots of healthy options available and ready-to-eat too.

As part of the family's healthy lifestyle, try to find healthy activities to do as a family on the weekends, like going to a park, walking (to the park/at the zoo/the neighborhood...), active things rather than TV or movies or eating out.

good luck. I 2nd the advice for a doctors check-up/health appraisal.

You are doing all (and actually more) than you can. This is not your problem - it's his. As they say, you can lead a horse to water, but can't make him drink. Until he recognizes and acknowledges the problem and wants to make the necessary changes himself, then there's not a thing you can do. You can tell him that you will be there to support him, but you can't make him do what he doesn't want to do. I lived with a man like that for 22 years and would coax and nag him to do healthy things, but it was all for naught.

The problem here is that your husband is an adult. You cannot force anything. You cannot make him care about his weight. And you cannot change his eating habits. You can express your concern (a limited number of times) and talk about him with it seriously (a limited number of times) and then you just have to let it go and love him for who he is...a fat man who is not going to take care of himself. If you nag constantly then the problem will become worse with him acting like a rebellious teen sneaking around and eating his junk. And it will damage your relationship. It is hard to stand back and let the people we love make bad choices, but when they are adults that is simply all you can do.

VickiS

Not sure...I'm having a similar problem. Though I've gained a few pounds over the "child bearing" years, I still dont' have a weight issue. I think if I started working out and ONLY cooked healthy and didn't buy ANY junk for the house, maybe he would jump on board??