Afraid I Wouldn't Be Able to Do It All.....

Updated on August 18, 2012
K.J. asks from Picayune, MS
17 answers

I start school on Monday. Happy and nervous at the same time. I'm going for PCT(patient care Technician). I have to go 8am-2pm; Everyday(Monday thru Friday) My two girls will be in school til 3:30 and my hubby will be home with our 3 year during the mornings. I been a SAHM for the last 6 years;had the same schedule etc. I know change is a good thing,but afraid i wouldn't be able to handle it. I think i'm worry about being a full time mom,full time student,wife,mother,etc. How do handle it all?

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So What Happened?

Thanks for all the warm wishes. I'm OCD. I like having everything done my way.lol..I know I'm going to need my husband to stand up and help me and I told him this and he understands. I think once the week or weeks go by i'll have a better understanding on what works best for me. I think i'm over stressing myself out now and school isn't started yet.lol. The good thing is that i should be done in May 2013,lucky not to long and my girls will be out for the summer. :) Thanks Again!!! :)

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S.D.

answers from St. Louis on

Congratulations!!!!!!! How exciting!

How do you do it all?? You DON'T! You do what you can...prioritize, be organized. Get kids and hubby to help Realize things will be different...pros and cons to everything in this life.

Take a lil time for you...everyonce in a while! (Recharging is important)

You can DO this!! Good luck and happy studying!!

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T.N.

answers from Albany on

I don't have any advice. I just want you to know I'm Your Number One Fan. Am the loudest cheerleader for moms who continue to better themselves, even while being in the throws of the busiest years of momhood.

So now that you know you're an inspiration to the rest of us, I guess you'll HAVE to pull it off, huh?

Congrats to you. You're an excellent role model for your children!

:)

4 moms found this helpful

J.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

change=) how wont you be able to handle it? logistically it sounds like its all covered. all of the kids are watched and you're home before they are with an hour to spare. breathe and get excited for the change

3 moms found this helpful

M.L.

answers from Chicago on

This is a BIG change for your family but it's not insurmountable. You can do it - it may feel overwhelming for a few weeks but you'll get into your groove. You can do it!!!!!!!!
Congratulations on your move to go back to school!!!!

3 moms found this helpful
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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

I think the hardest part was finding time to study. You have to schedule time. Sometimes that meant the early hours on the weekends. Or the hour between when you get home and the girls get home. Or when the girls sit and do their homework, you sit and do yours too.

Will it be hard, yes.
Will hubby feel like he's taking on more stuff, yes.
Will you feel that maybe it isn't worth all the trouble, yes.
BUT!!!!

When your girls see you graduate, and are super proud of their SUPERMOM, THEN, it is all worth it.

2 moms found this helpful

A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I wasn't a SAHM mom but I was a f/t time working pregnant then mom f/t student.

It takes time to adjust to the new schedule. Don't feel defeated...keep your eye on the main goals. One be the best mom/fulltime student you can be. If the house isn't polished...so be it. In the grand scheme of things a lived in house is not that bad.

YOU CAN DO IT!

2 moms found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Just make sure you allow yourself time to study, to have that alone time that you normally don't get. I know, I have yet to go to the bathroom alone in about 2 years.

I think that was the biggest thing I messed up on. My daughter would not stay asleep if any light at all was on in the house. It really made a difference in how my grades went.

"A"'s are important but not the "do all "A"'s or drop out" kind of mentality. They are important but they are just a goal not the only thing that matters.

Since you get out of school at 2 I suggest you take that extra hour to go to the library or stay on campus somewhere and study. Don't go home, too many chores will need your attention. Stay at school and break out the books. Do the lesson the prof. just did again. Read any text he used a lot. I know I had one professor that if he mentioned the same phrase more than twice we knew it would be a test question.

Use a tape recorder if you are having trouble remembering the lectures. Make sure you listen to them when you can. Your mind will eventually start to be able to remember the details more clearly.

And just have fun learning. This must be interesting to you so allow yourself to relax and enjoy the classes. They should be fun and interesting. I know some will be a total bore but then there will be those that you'll remember for ever.

Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
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P.K.

answers from New York on

You will do fine. Your husband will be home part of the day. Your girls are in school. I took that course and found it to be very doable. It you have kids you will get thru it with flying colors. The payoff is a good job. We are caregivers by nature. We have all taken care of sick kids, now you will take care of sick adults. Most of it will come naturally to you. Relax take a deep breath and do not worry about the house. It will be there next week. How long is the course. Good luck!!!!!

1 mom found this helpful

C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Well, right. You can't do it all. Neither can anyone else. Someone once compared being a working mom to being a duck - yeah, we look calm on the surface, but underneath, we're paddling like hell to stay afloat!

Just do what you can, and ask for help with what you can't. Prioritize the things that are important to you, and realize you'll have to let some things slide. It will be okay!

Good luck with school, and have fun!

1 mom found this helpful

P.W.

answers from Dallas on

Remind yourself that this is a phase and you can get through it. Make some changes for yourself. It will help if you can let go of certain unnecessary chores.

For example, if you are a clean freak, learn to let that go a bit. Cleaning a little less often and remind yourself a little dust is a small sacrifice for your sanity.

If you volunteer at the school, back off. My rule was to only volunteer when my child would be present, but you may have to forego all volunteering until you adjust and see how tough the schedule will be. Just say NO.

Ask for help. Let others help you out when possible. Delegate to kids and hubby. Folding laundry, etc.... If friends or family offer....... accept!

When you cook, make enough for two meals and freeze. Next week there will be a night all you have to do is defrost!

Pencil in time with your husband. I am serious! Make an appointment to be together. If you can afford a babysitter or leave the kids with family all the better. If you can't, then promise to meet on "saturday night at 10pm" or whatever works for you.

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T.M.

answers from Tampa on

Really? Who the hell DOES do it all? Some people are just better at faking it than others. If you look at me sometimes, I am sure that it looks like I have it all organized and together. However, you don't see that my floor desparately needs to be vacuumed, the dogs need baths, and the bathrooms need scrubbing! It sounds like you have the basics worked out just fine. Pick the things that mean the most to you. You don't have to send in homemade cupcakes for every fundraiser. Buy them and be done with it! You can't do everything...just do the best that you can.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

I'm an optimistic pessimist...

Which means I plan on EVERYTHING going wrong... But know I'll be able to sort it out when it does / plan for the worst and am (almost always) pleasantly surprised at how 'easy' it is.

I started school when my son was 2 months old (he's now 10, and I've taken a couple breaks for different reasons: worked for a year to get hubby graduated, took a year off to save up a downpayment/start homeschooling, 2 years just recently... For several reasons including my STBXH cracking my skull and almost killing me - jerk :P). Anyhow... I learned a LOT about what I need/ what my priorities are/ how to have my cake and eat it, too. But those will be MY answers, what works for me and what I need.

For example:

1) I can't study when my son is awake. When I try I become a mediocre mother and a mediocre student

2) know the only days I CAN'T miss (usually midterms and finals) and arrange backup childcare in 3 ways (never fails... If there is going to be stomach flu, or fevers -my kiddo, or the sitter!- it will be on one of those days.

3) arrange a camp/ weekend at Nonna's/ SOMETHING for my son the week before midterms and finals... So ive got bonus study time

3.5) NEVER count on bonus study time! (sick kids, cancelled camps, etc.)

4) always pay my bills 4 months ahead instead of 3 when living off financial aid (because next quarters financial aid will get screwed up of I dont, and take an extra couple weeks.

5) if its the gym or an A, I don't go to the gym. If its my child or an A, I take a B and deal with what needs to be done. MAD prioritizing. Which is super personal.

6/7/8/9/10... The lessons just keep coming, but as I said, they're site specific for what worked in my life.

To ME, having done both, school is a heckuva lot easier than working... I only needed 10 hours a week of childcare, could skip class almost whenever I felt like it -and ALWAYS when I NEEDED to... They couldn't fire me... My grade would just drop WORST case scenario. And usually it not by a whole letter. If it dropped at all (usually didn't even go down a smidge... Which is obvious when you're mostly a 4.0 student, a 3.9 is a smidge you can pinpoint the cause), but it usually didn't. Can't say the SA
E thing about work! (My son's having a tantrum / lovey phase, it's beautiful weather and were headed to the park/beach/mountains, I need a nap... Just aren't things you can tell your boss).

1 mom found this helpful

I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

You will learn to operate on a different speed. Your house won't be perfect. But you'll find a way.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

You learn to juggle!
Accept help when it's offered.
Get the kids to help by doing little chores - everybody helps!
Crockpots are WONDERFUL for meal planning.
Make and freeze meals for when you are running like a chicken with your head cut off.
Everyone has days like that.
It'll be an adjustment, but you'll be fine!

1 mom found this helpful

J.S.

answers from Hartford on

You'll handle it because you have your husband helping you. Hopefully, you have family and friends as an added support system, even if it's only to vent and maybe take the children for you for a few hours on weekends to study or so that you and your husband can have a date night.

I'm sure you'll do a great job. I think it's wonderful what you're going back to school for. I'll draw some inspiration from you. I'm going back to work shortly, and in a couple of weeks I'll be having my work assessment done to see how my work tolerance is. It won't be long after that when I'll be working permanently again. I've been a SAHM for almost 10 years. My hours will be only when they're in school, but this will be a huge change and my worries are similar to yours.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

If you're not already in counseling for the OCD, talk to your school - many schools have counseling available for free to their students. Perhaps they can help support you through the change and get your OCD out of your way a bit. Good luck!

J.E.

answers from Minneapolis on

My kids were babies and toddlers when I was in school, but they liked doing their homework (coloring) when I did mine. Looking back, I realize how busy I was but you do get through it. It sounds like you have a good support system so take advantage of it. You'll be home before the girls and your hubby gets to spend extra time with the 3 year old every day - that's awesome!
You really will do great! Prep ahead and make some frozen meals or do pizza when you have a test.
I remember one year during finals, one of the moms at my sons preschool took both kids one morning for a playdate. I had mentioned I had finals and this worked out great for me. She made an extra batch of monster cookies for me for him to take to preschool so I wouldn't have to! 11 years later I still appreciate that.

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